I was reading through articles one sleepless night and came across this… And this pretty much sums up me..
Being a strong woman usually comes with a price. Being strong in the face of trouble and stress may be exhausting and may result in a mix of emotions including panic and self-doubt.
She hides her insecurities. It’s not to say she is not phenomenally strong – she is. It’s to say that sometimes a woman that projects strength can hide her own issues.
A strong woman can get through anything, including a dysfunctional family fight, ended friendship, or heartbreak.
She is always there to greet you with her vibrant smile no matter how much tension she is going through. You only get to see the sunshine, not the clouds behind it.
Sometimes she does feel like she is living a lie, like others give her more credit than she really deserves.
Others think that her heart is unbreakable, since they see only one side of her. They only see this woman during the day, when she does have enough energy to pretend. However, they do not see her at night, when she is too exhausted to outrun her issues.
She does not let anybody catch her when she is vulnerable.
When she is upset, she makes up an excuse to cancel her plans, so nobody realizes that she is acting off. When she wants to cry, she does push the tears away until she goes to the bathroom. When she goes through a mental breakdown, she does not post a Facebook status or text her friends about that. She chooses to suffer in silence.
She does not want to share her misery. Her friends see her as bubbly, funny, and a problem solver. They often ask her for advice. They often come to her with their problems.
She decides to offer consolation when they complain about their problems instead of screaming that they do not actually know what real problems are.
She does listen and understand. She does want be a good friend.
When other people are around, it isn’t all that difficult to put her issues aside.
However, when she is out of view of them or gets in her car, her issues come crashing down around her.
That’s why she does not like midnight thoughts and long drives alone in her car. She does not want to be stuck in her own mind, as it is a dangerous place.
It is a place where she thinks she is behind in life. She isn’t smart. She isn’t beautiful. She isn’t successful. She will die without chasing all of her dreams.
Although she’s strong, her fears do not leave her alone, making her feel useless, worthless and small.
She does not understand she is strong, as she keeps going. But, she is strong, since she can smile through the pain. She is strong, since she still has hope. She is strong, as she is still alive.
Source: positivethingsonly.com